Sometimes, some situations can’t be salvaged. Best to just walk away.

After hours, days, weeks, even years, we’re still stumped. We ask ourselves, “How do I best to respond to this? How can I safely, effectively, and wisely respond to this situation without making it worse? Is there a way to put out this fire without personally getting engulfed by the flames?”

Can this situation be effectively addressed in a manner that allows me to maintain my sanity, composure and integrity? Is there a possibility that I might get ensnared by the same clutches that I am trying to rescue someone from? Can I salvage the situation, or do I just need to humbly walk away?

Sometimes we might find that when faced with a difficult situation, the answers to the questions above are a resounding “NO. There’s nothing you can do”. So what to do next? My suggestion? Stop doing. Simply refuse to engage. Stay away. Don’t take the bait. Walk away.

This is especially important if this is a chronic problem that you have in your personal life, say like in a relationship or business. Sometimes there simply is no way to tackle a problem without getting sucked in. You know this because you’ve tried it many times before.

You went in with good intentions and suggestions that you thought were reasonable solutions to the problem. Instead of support and understanding, you received severe push back, defensiveness, and may be even anger.

Eventually you realize that you can’t fix this problem, and that every attempt that you have made in the past has not only failed, but they have left you drained and increasingly disillusioned.

It’s time to disengage. Tune out. Abandon the ‘rescue mission’. It isn’t going to work. If anything, you could end up both causing irreparable damage to your relationship and getting yourself dragged down in the mire.

Some situations are simply too complex and ingrained in people’s character and behavior patterns for us to resolve, no matter how well-meaning we are. This is way above your pay grade. Give it up, or go down with it. A dead man can save no one.

You know what they say about saving a drowning man- as you try to rescue him, be careful that he doesn’t pull you down into the water with him and you both drown.


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